Unforgiveness

October 30, 2009 by · Leave a Comment
Filed under: Biblical Teachings, Godly Principles 

“But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:15

By definition, forgiveness means to pardon an offender and to give up the resentment and desire to retaliate or pay the person back somehow.  In essence, forgiveness allows for the mistakes made by others.  In Matthew 6:14, Jesus tells us how important it is to forgive others:

“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.” 

He also continues in verse 15 saying,

“but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

A question to ask yourself is “What would happen to me if my Heavenly Father didn’t forgive me of my sin?

S   E   L   A   H

When concluding the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant, Jesus called the forgiven servant who DID NOT forgive “wicked” and proceeded with the following:

“‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” (Matthew 18:32-35)

BE CAREFUL

Do not make the mistake of thinking that you’ve forgiven a person just because you said the words.  No, that is untrue and is actually a misconception.  As Jesus mentioned above, we must forgive from the heart.  Anyone can say anything; however, saying it doesn’t make it true if you have something completely different in your heart. 

TELL BY THEIR FRUIT

In addition to forgiveness being the start of the healing process, forgiveness also manifests fruit.  In Matthew 7:14, Jesus lets us know that we can tell a truth about a person based upon their fruit.  So is the same about forgiveness.  Forgiveness exercises the fruit of the Spirit especially LOVE, which covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).  Similarly, unforgiveness also bears fruit, all of which are contrary to the fruit of the Spirit.  Some of its fruit, as well as the consequences, are:

  Anger

  Self-pity

  Resentment

  Bitterness

  Revenge

  Hatred

  Depression

  Despondency

  Strife

  Unkindness

  Insecurity

  Envy

  Jealousy

  Tormentors are called on those who do not forgive.

  Prayers hindered

  Personal sins not forgiven

  Will call us to judgment on the matter

  Negatively effects other relationships (family, marriage, friends, business, etc)

  Has earthly and eternal consequences

  We block our spiritual communication with God.

 NOTHING OR NO ONE ARE WORTH IT!

It is better for you to quickly forgive than to jeopardize your own relationship with God.

 

MAKE A DECISION

Decide that you will forgive EVERYONE who has ever hurt or offended you in your life, and ask the Holy Spirit to help you to do this.  For some, you may need to go to the person and let him/her know that you’ve forgiven the offense.  This will help release you and that person from the negative feelings they’ve held on to as a result of the offense.

Realizing that some hurts are more difficult to get over than others, another way you can go about forgiveness is to think to yourself, ‘What if I was in the other person’s shoes?  Would I want forgiveness?  Would I want God to forgive me if I committed the same offense this person did?”  Chances are you’ve answered “yes” to these 3 questions.  Even unbelievers desire to be forgiven for their offenses—as a bad conscious is impossible to escape.  Everywhere you are, your conscious will be, and there’s no amount of alcohol, drugs, or any other self-medicating substances or actions that can completely remove a guilty conscious.

Forgiveness is a choice and decision that you must make; and the initiative you must take each time you are offended – whether intentionally or unintentionally.  Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to teach you how to forgive quickly and completely, and then allow Him to do what He must do to get you there.  Be sure to also forgive those who have hurt you in the past so that you are released from those negative emotion and painful memories.  If you need to actually call the offending person or drop by for a visit, then do it!  It is far better for you to withstand those few moments of awkwardness than to allow unforgiveness, resentment and other negative feelings to eat away any good things in your life because you’re still locked to the bad things.  Unforgiveness robs you from joy, peace, and experience the fullness of love in your life.

In closing, I’d like to say to you if you ever find yourself in a position that the offense was so ‘unforgiveable’ and the hurt was so immeasurable, then I invite you to go into the book of Matthew 18:21-35 (conveniently posted below), and read and mediate on the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant.  For your convenience, I’ve posted this parable below and I truly advise you to read it, dissect it, mediate on it and ask the Holy Spirit to help you in this area.  Though sometimes it’s hard to forgive, especially in the beginning of your ‘forgiveness’ walk, the rewards of forgiveness greatly outweigh the offense.  The flipside to this is that the consequences of unforgiveness greatly outweigh the actual offense itself. 

Just do yourself the favor and forgive!

 S   E   L   A   H

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Tags: 1 Peter 4:8, anger, bitterness, consequences, decide, depression, despondency, envy, forgive, forgiveness, forgiveness is a choice, fruit, hatred, heart, Holy Ghost, Holy Spirit, hurt, jealousy, love, Matthew 18:32-35, Matthew 6:15, negativity, not forgiven, prayer blocker, Relationships, revenge, self-pity, strife, tormentors, unforgiveness, unkindness

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